2014 MLS Playoffs

Phall

Master
Joined
Sep 19, 2012
Messages
2,159
Location
not Brooklyn
Anyone that needs a break from American football this weekend can flip to the second legs of the MLS quarterfinals. Today's game is the New York Red Bulls vs DC United. This is a clear-cut caste matchup, with the disgraceful NYRB starting a ridiculous total of three white players. Unfortunately, "Dax and the blacks" won their home leg 2-0, so DC essentially needs three goals on their turf to go through. DC finished first in the eastern conference and generally starts seven white players, mostly young Americans.

Tomorrow (Sunday) features the whitest team attempting to climb a similar mountain, as Columbus Crew and their eight white starters try to overcome a 4-2 home defeat to the white-hot New England Revolution, who are not particularly white at all. Later, LA Galaxy hosts Real Salt Lake after a goalless draw in Utah. The Galaxy are the whiter team; no grand feat since RSL does not represent its hometown demographics at all.

Monday night has top points-winner Seattle hosting FC Dallas after tying 1-1 last week. This game is rather ambiguous in terms of starting players, so it is only individual performances that hold interest.

Right now, DC has a goal in the 38th minute, so they are very much alive.
 

Phall

Master
Joined
Sep 19, 2012
Messages
2,159
Location
not Brooklyn
DC's most important player is 22-yr old holding midfielder Perry Kitchen. CB Steve Birnbaum (jew) is the likely 'rookie of the year'; MLS stalwart Bobby Boswell helps anchor that back line. Colombian forward Fabian Espindola is sort of a harnizo "white Hispanic" - the storyline with him is that he was run off the Red Bulls roster last season by ever-petulant Thierry Henry, who did not like passing to him.

The Red Bulls midfield features regulars Dax McCarty and Eric Alexander, who both made the US national team camp last year for the domestic "C team" exhibitions. Astoundingly, World Cup golazo author Tim Cahill (half-Samoan) has been relegated to the bench this series. Aforementioned "French" cosmopolitan racist Thierry Henry is playing his last games with NYRB, partnering with Championship cast-off Bradley Wright-Phillips, who tied the league record with 27 sitters this season. Wright-Phillips is represented by David Dien, the jewish sports agent who was best man at Henry's wedding some years ago. Dien's father is famous for his role in importing Africans to Arsenal and keeping the Premier League from restricting international player tallies. Thankfully, both will be gone next season and the roster will be overhauled.

The key player for Columbus is young defensive midfielder Wil Trapp, who is destined for the national team roster despite being neither black nor having dual citizenship. Defender Michael Parkhurst is the maestro for offside traps, and winger Ethan Finlay is young, promising, and worth mentioning whenever Klinsmann eventually omits him.

For New England, Kelyn Rowe can play pretty much all over the midfield and can take free kicks with his right foot. Chris Tierney gets forward well from the back line. Vietnamese MVP candidate Lee Nguyen is a caste-busting anomaly, if you're into that sort of thing.

For Seattle, we are pretty much rooting for a Clint Dempsey show, although Guatemalan castizo CM Marco Pappa might be the most crucial player on the field. For Dallas, defender Matt Hedges is an all-star and national team consideration. I can't make heads or tails of the talented Brazilian Michel's racial admixture: he has blonde hair but looks sort of like a tanned albino negro. Regardless, he is key to the chance of an upset.

Real Salt Lake features no white stars but has a 3/4 white back line, which is about the best you can aspire to by MLS standards. Weird Rastafarian jew Kyle Beckermann is a familiar countenance, although he is a bit past his dominant prime these days.

The top LA Galaxy storyline is retiring Landon Donovan's swan song. Irish striker Robbie Keane knocks in plenty of goals and is probably still the league's best forward, with double-digit assists to boot. Serbian Baggio Husidic stretches the midfield and could be plucked by a European side this offseason. One funny game to play will be waiting for the scripted commentary for homosexual Robbie Rogers. If the game is on NBC, expect a quote about how he know "owns the position" of wing back. ESPN/ABC will cite an "exciting reemergence" at a new position, and both networks will insist that we "shouldn't be surprised if Klinsmann comes calling for the national team." These sound bytes are 100% guaranteed; I've heard them multiple times already.

Strictly by racial rooting interests, I would rank the remaining eight teams as follows:
1. Columbus
2. DC United
3. LA Galaxy
4-6: doesn't much matter
7/8 are the odious, interracial cuckold fetishist New York Red Bulls and Real Salt Lake squads.
 

Phall

Master
Joined
Sep 19, 2012
Messages
2,159
Location
not Brooklyn
Might as well say it in this thread: I am 100% certain that there are some unspoken quotas where each team must field a bare minimum single black player at all times. Take for example the new Man City affiliate NYCFC franchise, who will play in Yankee Stadium next year. They currently have six players under contract, most notably international stars David Villa and Frank Lampard. Their most recent acquisition is minor league re-tread Kwame Watson-Siriboe, an absolutely pointless signing apart from his diversity qualification. This guy no longer plays in MLS, is not particularly young or promising at age 27, and is at best completely interchangeable via expansion draft, collegiate draft, or free agency. If one scout really liked him, he could be monitored until preseason training camp (since he is going nowhere). Rather, he has been gifted a spot so that no one picks up on a very white roster foundation.
 

Matra2

Master
Joined
Jul 6, 2011
Messages
2,317
This is a clear-cut caste matchup, with the disgraceful NYRB starting a ridiculous total of three white players.

I tuned in just a minute before the Red Bulls scored. Thierry Henry set up some blacker guy. During the goal celebration it looked like an all black team until one conspicuous white guy showed up in the team hug.

The top levels of soccer (Europe) are still mostly dominated by whites yet the team that wins the American-based MLS could end up being almost entirely black. No wonder hockey stands out in the US sporting landscape.
 

frederic38

Hall of Famer
Joined
Jun 22, 2011
Messages
4,774
Location
france-grenoble
I tuned in just a minute before the Red Bulls scored. Thierry Henry set up some blacker guy. During the goal celebration it looked like an all black team until one conspicuous white guy showed up in the team hug.

The top levels of soccer (Europe) are still mostly dominated by whites yet the team that wins the American-based MLS could end up being almost entirely black. No wonder hockey stands out in the US sporting landscape.

i'm glad henry's team didn't end up winning, i hate him so much :icon_lol:
but regarding the MLS, i saw that even jozy altindore scored there :icon_lol:
 
Top